En mis ojos son Estrellas.

Hello everyone and Happy Easter/vacation! It is hard to believe that it has been three months since I have been here in Nicaragua. It feels like just yesterday I was drinking that fabulous champagne with Robin, packing with the girls and Des and watching our President be inaugurated. I hope that everyone is doing well and is holding those memories I was fortunate enough to share with you as close to your heart as I am. This will be my last blog as a Peace Corps trainee…because I will attending our swearing-in ceremony on Tuesday the 14th and officially be a Peace Corps Volunteer!

Pulgas.
So. Pulgas are … fleas. Seriously. Who has fleas? Oh wait…me. I discovered them last week and like any other illness here – it is difficult to tell where I got them from. The countless number of stray dogs here in Nicaragua carry them and they can easily be transferred to humans. I am not the first person in our group to get them – which somehow made me feel a little better. They look similar to the ‘allergic reaction’ I had after my volunteer visit to the mountains, but far, far less in numbers. The problem with this – is after you get them, they are very difficult to get rid of. They can live in clothes and especially in mattresses. It is sort of a snowball effect. My family here has helped a lot and put my mattress in the sun twice and also all of my clothes in effort to kill these little guys.
I had a little bit of a difficult time dealing with this ailment for the sole reason that I am sick of dealing with one after another. It is incredibly emotionally draining. You would think physically it would be the most challenging to deal with illness after illness, but it truly is the emotional aspect. The lack of control that I have over all of it – is very frustrating. I am just going to have to find ways to deal with this during my service – because it is clearly not an isolated incident.

Mail
I got a package each from Aunt Linda and Aunt Gail! Thank you so much! Funny story about that – in the package from Aunt Gail there was a trail mix which included Pistachios. I got a fair warning via e-mail to not eat the pistachios from the mix. I told my host-mom about it, salmonella and all, but she quickly said ‘Well they are bad for you Americans … but we have stronger stomachs. I am sure we will be fine!’ So throughout the week, my entire host family was eating these pistachios. Yesterday, everyone – including the three year old girl had serious stomach issues. I tried to warn them! Ha. Guess their stomachs aren’t that strong.
I also got a letter from Cathy Drew! That was so sweet and a lovely surprise! Number one mailers… Kimmy for her ridiculous cards and of course my parents! We are still missing one package that was sent in February, but I have faith that it is going to get here within the next week. I have to admit that the Girl Scout cookies that you sent are almost gone Mom. Ha. They almost lasted two days. All of the clothes and materials for my posters are perfect! Thank you again <3 you are the bestest.

Grupo de jovenes
Forming and running a youth group with three other leaders was definitely an interesting experience. In the end I learned a LOT both in general and on a more personal level. There were times throughout the experience when I dreaded going to our meetings (twice a week). More than anything I recognized things that I would different with my own group, such as; make rules in the beginning about respecting each other. Ultimately, we ended up completing two mini-projects within the community (we were required to do one). Our group of six gave charlas in the high school on HIV, STDs and Adolescent pregnancy. Then we got funds from the mayor (alcade) to paint a mural on the dirtiest building known to man. This building, glorietta, is in the middle of the park, in the center of town. Until this point, it had solely been used for any man to urinate in and draw obscene pictures on the outside (please see pictures posted on facebook to get image). The smell is only describable to those who had the misfortune to witness it.
Cleaning it was without a doubt the worst part of the process. It ended up only being a three day process, in total. And we completed a beautiful mural about… contraceptive methods. My life here is hilarious. Ha. I had huge doubts about how long this would last, but so far so good – people have urinated in the building – but other than that, no one has defaced the mural. We felt a great sense of accomplishment after finishing these two projects and the six teenagers came and presented to the rest of the group what they had done. I am not going to lie, I am glad it is over! But I do feel optimistic about forming my own youth group in Posoltega.

Español
So I received the same level of Spanish as my second interview in country (about one month ago). I think that is complete…BS, but oh well. We had the interviews Monday and received the results on Tuesday – which I thought was incredibly shady. The feedback did not consist of any specific examples of my errors and I feel that this level may have been determined by our teacher prior to the interview (which stinks because my interview was pretty fabulous). Well that is just all the more room to improve during these next two years. Also, without a doubt I feel confident in my ability to communicate in my community, which I did not feel when I walked off that plane January 22nd. I guess that is all I can ask for!

Ambassador
This past Wednesday we had the honor of meeting the U.S. Ambassador of Nicaragua, Robert Callahan. He was …amazing, fascinating and even more so…inspiring! As training has continued on, I feel that our group has become more and more negative. I have tried to separate myself from it – because I recognize it accomplishes nothing, but it has been difficult. Meeting Ambassador Callahan was so refreshing. He had such an incredible story and has lived an incredible life, traveling from country to country. In reality, we, as Peace Corps volunteers, are United States Ambassadors (on the grassroots level). He said that in the first paragraph of any letter from the President, is the reminder that the first job of a U.S. Ambassador is to get to know the community and culture of that you are living in.
He spoke quite frankly about the last eight years, regarding the United States, including: the government’s reaction to 9/11. His honesty and frankness was much appreciated when talking about his previous ‘boss’ and president of our country. He also spoke about the current political situation between Nicaragua and the United States. I am going to refrain from talking about this in a public forum, but it is getting very interesting. If you would like to hear more about what he said regarding this – just shoot me an e-mail and I would be happy to explain more.

Alcoholismo
When I first read that the alcoholism rate in Nicaragua was higher than in the United States, I had my doubts. Well… this has proved to be truer than I ever imagined. I never thought that walking by a man completely passed out in the road, with a bottle of the cheapest rum available in his hand, would be normal. There have been many times that I thought the man was actually not breathing that I passed by. I have seen pre-teen boys move a passed out 50+man out of the sun so that he does not burn to death in the park. Beyond upsetting. Hana’s host-uncle was a ‘recovering alcoholic’ for the first two months that we were here, and is now one of the men that I walk by, pondering if he is alive. She often finds him passed out on her porch as she walks into her house. He has been wearing the same shirt for over three weeks. Once a deep navy color, his shirt is now the palest of blues.
I have not decided if the rate of alcoholism truly is higher here, or whether it is just more visible. There is technically a law about drinking in public here, just as there is in the U.S. The difference is that it is not enforced. What good is a law if it is not enforced? This is a common theme here in Nicaragua. But just because America is able to send many alcoholics to jail and/or treatment, does it mean there is less of an incidence? This has caused me to think a lot about my job at Brandywine Counseling and I have talked about it many times with Hana and people of this community. What is more bothering here than anything is that it is an accepted part of their culture. It does not really affect anyone to pass someone barely breathing on the street. This is more foreign to me than the language.

taxing
I just wanted to make a quick mention of the neighbor of Brad (my fellow PCV). He is a very well-traveled man, I consider him incredibly worldly having lived in Israel, Africa and many other countries. While talking to Brad, he mentioned that he had visited Posoltega, and said to Brad, “I hope that Amanda is able to adapt there… it is one of the poorest towns I have seen and it will be very difficult.” Instead of bursting into tears, this actually comforted me. I thought maybe just the sheltered girl from Delaware was being too sensitive and dramatic – and that this site was not that bad. His statement was confirmation that this indeed is a very poor site, even for Nicaraguan standards. I had begun to question whether it was just me, but his comments actually comforted me and validated my feelings.
These two years are going to be difficult, but I am feeling more and more optimistic as the day approaches that I begin my two years of service in Posoltega. There is so much work to be done… and I am so ready to start! I don’t think I mentioned in the last blog that ten years ago, in 1998, Posoltega fell victim to a landslide provoked by the torrential downpours of Hurricane Mitch. Somewhere between 2,000 and 4,000 people died during this event (they were never really able to get an exact number, some predict more than 5,000). Members of the community have described it as ‘the world ending’ as this natural disaster swallowed two entire towns of my municipality. Needless to say, ten years later in the impoverished country – they are still very much affected by this event. At one of the NGOs in town, there are pictures of former president Bill Clinton directly after this event visiting the sites of destruction. This is the greatest natural disaster to occur in Nicaragua and is undoubtedly still affecting my community greatly.
Just a side note: we received a charla from US AID, and I found out that more than 75 percent of the birth control and condoms provided to Nicaraguans are through US AID aka… our tax money. So you all are actually helping fight the problems I am facing here in my work, HIV/AIDS and teenage pregnancy. So assuming that you pay your taxes, thank you!

I’m not a playa…
No that is not a quote from a Notorious B.I.G. song; playa is beach in Spanish. Which is where everyone goes during this week before Easter, otherwise known as Semana Santa here. Essentially the entire country shuts down and people flock to the beach. Ironically, it is also the most dangerous week to swim in a body of water in Nicaragua. Apparently, every year hundreds of people die of drowning during this week’s festivities. Other interesting facts about this week: for weeks now, people have been carrying around a somewhat Disco-Jesus. They call it ‘the procession’ of which they carry around Jesus and there is usually a fabulous band to accompany the procession. And by fabulous I mean... on the same level as Mr. Byerly’s intermediate band in 6th grade. This could actually be cute, minus the fact that they do it at all hours of the night. The first was literally at 4:00 in the morning. AM. En serio? There is one going on right now outside of my window, which is quite impressive considering they were up until 1:00am last night carrying disco-Jesus around.
I somehow convinced my host-mom (who hates the beach) to go to the beach for the day on Thursday. I was allowed to invite Hana and also the ama de casa or ‘maid’ came along with her two children. This woman, Almpuro, has proved to be my favorite person here in El Rosario. The conversations that she and I had when no one else was around – were my favorites throughout training. Also, whenever I was ill – she was incredibly more caring than my host-mom.
Anyway, this ‘playa’ was about 3 miles off the main road. After making it through all of the dust from the road, we made it to the playa. We then parked in someone’s yard (which oddly reminded me of the Delaware State Fair) and headed to the beach. Well I ran…because the amount of gnats and bugs was disgusting. Down by the beach, the bugs were far and few between. My entire family sat up in the shade and Hana and I baked down by the water. The water was not particularly clean and it was difficult not to run into a piece of trash while entering the water. It was way too hot to be concerned with that and I swam anyway. This ‘beach’ was actually on Lake Nicaragua. Nicaraguans don’t really differentiate between bodies of water.
Hana and I decided to go for a walk down to the more happening part of the beach. The true picture of Samana Santa was about to be viewed. A lot of drunk people (I think this observation combined with the fact that most Nicaraguans I have met cannot swim may something to do with the amount of drownings that occur). We went into one of the little cabana bars and it was quite entertaining. Only the drunkest people were dancing to the DJ music, which clearly was my favorite part. Hana and I were harassed, per usual, by all of the men. I think one actually got down on his knee begging me to dance with him. Normal. Right outside of the bar, there was a man passed out – and his friends were trying to perform drunken CPR on him. I did see that he was breathing, which made me feel a little bit better. Later, they would throw him into the water to wake him up. Fabulous. After a few beers (oh my GOD I miss good beer and ANY wine), Hana and I went to another bar. Within five seconds of entering, at least 7 guys swarmed our table like hungry bees and were asking us to dance. Within ten seconds of entering the bar….we left. Ha.
I knew that I was getting sun throughout the day and applied lotion several times throughout the day. Apparently…not enough. I think I technically could have been diagnosed with 1st degree burns. My lips are burnt, which is by far the worst part. Ouch! Hana and I have gone through an entire bottle of lotion (that we have been putting in the freezer), to help ease the pain. Hopefully it will fade by Tuesday’s swearing-in ceremony or I will look like a tomato!

Next phase..
So now the real work begins. Or at least the real part of my experience. These past three months have been amazing, but the reality is that these next two years are going to be very, very different. Everything is so micro-managed and scheduled during training and the volunteer experience is the complete opposite. I do not think I will have any problem keeping myself busy in my site. If you know me well, it will be more difficult to allow myself not to do anything. I do not know whether this is something I inherited from my parents or whether it is a cultural thing – but I am going to have to work on just letting myself sit and talk – because that is work here. I know the hardest part will be being far away from the people I have become closest to, particularly Hana.
So as I prepare to leave El Rosario, I have a strange mix of emotions. I am excited to be more independent, but I know I will miss my host-family here in some aspects. I am ready to start working and having more freedom, but I know I will miss some of the structure and support of being a trainee. I am anxious about living in Posoltega (the living conditions) but excited to start developing relationships within my community. I am SO ready to cook my own (more nutritious) food, but I know after a long day – I will miss someone having a plate ready for me. It is all so exciting and unknown – this experience really is about to start now! And I feel even more prepared than when I arrived in country about 90 days ago. When I am able to step back for a moment, I remember how incredibly lucky I am to be having this experience. Not only because getting into the Peace Corps is a ridiculous application process, but in other countries – many people do not get this opportunity. I am so lucky to live in a country that believes in serving humanity not just themselves. If I were to have gone with a different program or just gone abroad by myself, there is no way I could have possibly afforded it or really had been successful in giving anything sustainable to a community. I do have that opportunity here, within this organization. I am so blessed to have this opportunity – and with all my power, will try not to ever forget that.
In closing, I wanted to share with you the Promesa de Servicio, or Promise of Service, that I will be reciting during my swearing-in ceremony on Tuesday (in English).
In the name of God and for the understanding and friendship among people and Nations, I solemnly promise to work with dedication and enthusiasm in the tasks that are assigned to me, during two years, or during the time that I may stay in the country.
I promise to strive to secure bonds of affection and solidarity with the Nicaraguan people through mutual respect and sincere vocation of service.
For God, for Country, for Peace.
I am here representing all of YOU with honor…because you all are a part of me.
Happy Easter everyone. Love you all so much <3
I will leave you with this fun fact: I brought these amazing vacuum-sealed bags for my clothes to pack and save space. Obstacle I did not foresee: there are no carpets here… and therefore also an absence of vacuums. I just packed all of my things to move to my site and had to get creative. I sucked all of the air out of the bag with my… mouth. Still feeling a little lightheaded. Ha. So resourceful.